Ann Quasman's WomanTalkLive A more conscious conversation

This Week on WomanTalk Live: “Being There – Giving Back Through Mentoring” – a Conscious Conversations Café Show with Alexia Clifton, Kim Fabian & LaQuisha Hall

        
      Alexia Clifton                 Kim Fabian                   LaQuisha Hall

Mentoring young people has proven to be an effective strategy for not only boosting academic achievement, but also for providing them with social development skills and improving their overall lives, which increases their opportunities for long-term success.

Joining me this week in the Conscious Conversations Café are three women who are “being there” for young people in the community and making a big difference:

Alexia Clifton  – a health, fitness and wellness consultant with over 20 years of experience in the fitness industry.  She has owned and operated No Sweat Fitness, Inc. in Baltimore for the past 11 years.  She has been a volunteer with First Lady Michelle Obama’s “Let’s Move” initiative for the past 5 years and also volunteers for “Marathon Kids”, another youth based organization.  Her television series, FitWorld is aimed at children and teens and will debut on Howard County Cable TV in the near future.

Kim Fabian – a Senior Vice President for Junior Achievement of Central Maryland. Serving more than 38,000 K-12 students each year, JA empowers young people to own their future success through programs in work readiness, entrepreneurship and financial literacy.

LaQuisha Hall – Mrs. Essence 2013, the founder of iEAT (Empower. Aspire. Transform.) and Queendom T.E.A. Mentoring, and the author of Positively Bodyful, a self-esteem journal for girls. Her mission is to empower women and girls through building their self-esteem and educating them on the issues of sexual abuse and domestic violence.

Tune in to hear, from their perspectives, why “being there” and giving back is so important for our young people and what giving back has meant for them.

Saturday, October 5th, from 6:07-7:00 pm ET on Talkradio 680 WCBM Baltimore or “Listen Live” online.   

 You can also download the WCBM 680 app at iTunes or for Android  

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Ann and Leonard Raskin

Be sure to check out last week’s show – No Surprises: Year-End Tax Planning and What to Prepare for in the Coming Year – with Leonard Raskin, the CEO of Raskin Global and Women Getting Wise on Wealth, and the WTL Wealth Expert about what you need to pay particular attention to this year and just how recent changes will be affecting your overall finances.

If you missed the show or you want to share it with a friend, it’s in the podcast archive now.  It’s the September 28th show!

On My Mind: When Friends Slip Away

Friendship – real friendship – is a two-way street.  Right?  Sure, you have plenty of acquaintances and associates, but you can probably count on one hand the number of real friends you have.  Those friends who have your back, provide an ear, cheer  you up, hold your hand, and often, share just what you need to hear when you need to hear it.  And, without a doubt, you’re there in the same way for them.

But it’s not always that way.

I was talking with two women over the past few weeks who felt as if their close, long-term friends (their BFFs) were slipping away.  Were they getting a friendship divorce?  That’s what it felt like to them although neither had had any type of confrontation or even a discussion about a breakup with their friend.  What they had noticed was – the Friendship Bank was running low.

I had just read an article about that very thing in the Wall Street Journal several weeks ago (09/23/13) written by Elizabeth Bernstein called, “The Friendship Bank: How and Why Even the Most Giving Friend Expects Payback.”  And, this is what my friends were describing.  Friendships, where they had been there for the other person and in the past, that friend had been there for them.  And, now the friend was putting them on the backburner.  Taking a long time to return a phone call or email.  Being almost impatient with them.

And, when they looked back over the course of the friendship, maybe they had given more in the relationship all along and what really disappointed them was when they really needed something, their friend wasn’t there for them.

Not that friendships are tit for tat.  They shouldn’t have to be.  But, just as in any relationship, one party shouldn’t be expected to do all of the heavy lifting.

I asked why they hadn’t talked with their friends about the obvious hurt they were feeling.  One had and felt as if she’d been blown off  – as if she was just imagining that things were different.  The other, who hates confrontation as much as her friend, was just planning on slipping away.  The easy way out?  I’m not so sure about that.

We could probably analyze these relationships big time.  Most of us have been in friendships that slipped away.  In fact, I interviewed author Megan McMorris several years ago after she had written a book called, P.S. What I Didn’t Say, about the things – good and bad – that women wished they had said to a friend who was no longer around.  Some of the stories really hit home with me.

Several years after one of my biggest breakups, I can look back with an entirely different viewpoint.  It was a relationship that had run its course.  Both of us had grown and gone in different directions.  And, just like with a love relationship, you know when it’s over.  Sad?  Often.  Opportunity? Can be.  It can provide the chance to continue to grow and connect with new friends.  And, that is good, if you take the new lessons along with you.

Ever had a lopsided friendship or one that faded away?  How did it affect you and what did you learn about yourself?

WTL 5: Meet Susan Bishop

     Five provocative questions answered by an inspiring and fabulous woman  – a woman with something to say.

Meet Susan Bishop

Susan Bishop of Unlocked Box is a certified professional coach specializing in creativity, innovation and risk-taking in work, life and branding. She works primarily with entrepreneurs, solopreneurs, small businesses and creative professionals who want to make stuff happen.

People would be surprised to know that: I still sing into my hairbrush DAILY.

The WTL 5:

What’s the conversation that changed your life?

In working through the aftermath of my ex-husband’s affair, I was terrified. I wanted to stay in my marriage, but I also didn’t think I could make it on my own. Which meant that staying wouldn’t be totally by choice. My counselor said: “You have to be free to go, before you can be free to stay.” It hit me so deeply. Not just in regard to my relationship, but also in relation to the death grip I had on everything; the control I was desperately trying not to lose. For me, that one conversation was the start of learning to let go, and of truly living from love and not fear. 

What are you most conscious of today?

The impermanence of everything and the urgency of NOW have always been major themes for me, but today, I seem to be conscious of them at a heightened level. I’m feeling a new energy around making stuff happen and a new sadness around lost opportunity. There’s a saying that goes, “All you have to do is the next right thing.” Today, I’m incredibility conscious of whether or not my minutes were filled with that next right thing or with a bunch of fluff.  

What part of you have you yet to give voice to?

This one is tricky because I have given voice to her in lots of ways, but not fully. It’s the artist who wants to shake mountains with her work – and the saboteurs in my head are screaming, “Hey, you create lots of stuff – it’s good enough!” But the truth is that I haven’t even begun to create in the way I know I can and I’m ready to impact more people through my work.  

What’s the conversation women need to be having collectively?

I think we need a conversation about money. Specifically, about not undervaluing our worth, investing in our own and each other’s ideas with actual cash and stopping the bartering crap. I think as women we may feel we’re “making it work” by asking for a discount, telling service providers we don’t have the money, etc., but I think underlying that behavior is a lack of confidence in our own value. We have to talk about putting our money where our mouths are when it comes to supporting each other. 

What needs to be said bigger, louder, stronger?

You don’t have to have it all figured out to start. Too much of the time we forget that the woman who is sharing her ideas with us for “feedback” might just benefit far more from our unwavering support than she ever would from our advice – no matter how experienced we are. 

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Thank you, Susan, for sharing your powerful voice

with WomanTalk Live.

WTL Wrap-Up: “No Surprises – Year-End Tax Planning Considerations and What to Prepare for in the Coming Year”

Ann and Leonard Raskin

The more things change when Congress makes or doesn’t make decisions… the smarter we need to be with our money.  And in the last quarter of the year, it just makes sense to have a good idea of the tax law changes that will be affecting you and to know what may be coming up in the New Year.

From my conversation with the WTL Wealth Expert, Leonard Raskin, the CEO of Raskin Global and Women Getting Wise on Wealth, one thing is for sure – nothing is simple anymore and everything changes from year to year.

We discussed changes in itemized deductions, the new unearned income tax, the new Medicare tax, the new capital gains tax, the new top income tax bracket and changes that same-sex married couples will be facing.

It’s becoming quite clear that one of the smartest things anyone can do is sit down and have a discussion with an advisor who can steer you in the most prudent direction for your personal situation.  It only makes sense.

If you missed the show, tune in to find out how you can be smart with your money and head into the tax season with NO surprises.

The podcast will be posted in the podcast archive later on this week.  It’s the September 28th show.

This Week on WomanTalk Live: “No Surprises – Year-End Tax Planning Considerations and What to Prepare for in the Coming Year” with Leonard Raskin

Leonard Raskin

It’s that time of year when, like it or not, it’s time to take a look at your tax planning for the year and be prepared for upcoming changes in current laws and just how those changes may affect you.

The WomanTalk Live Wealth Expert, Leonard Raskin, the CEO of Raskin Global and Women Getting Wise on Wealth, will be joining me to educate us all about:

• FHA policy changes – thinking about buying a home?
• Itemized deduction changes (just when you thought you knew the rules)
• New unearned income tax
• New Medicare tax
• New Capital Gains tax
• New Top Income Tax Bracket

We’ll even discuss the state of Obamacare and what you will want to be aware of as you make decisions about your future healthcare.

So what do you need to do now?  Join us, get smart about your financial situation and be prepared.  No surprises.

Saturday, September 28th, from 6:07-7:00 pm ET on Talkradio 680 WCBM Baltimore or “Listen Live” online.   

 You can also download the WCBM 680 app at iTunes or for Android  

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Bob, Ann and Lori

Be sure to check out last week’s show – Where Has All the Romance Gone (And How to Find It) – when I talked with the WTL Relationship Experts, Lori and Bob Hollander of Relationships Work, about the cycles our relationships go through as a matter of course and how to keep the spice, the romance and the love alive.

If you missed the show or you want to share it with a friend, it’s in the podcast archive now.  It’s the September 21st show!